I have been doing a lot of thinking lately, about my life but mostly about the people in my life. I am really struggling with the meaning of friend.
I was burned, really bad, recently and because of that incident I have been analyzing all my friendships and I am starting to realize that some friends aren't really there for me.
I don't think being a friend to someone should be HARD work. If it is, why are you friends? Is it a constant give, give, give? Do you receive anything in return? I don't mean receive as in monetary or in actual material items, I am referring to emotionally. When was the last time YOU got a phone call instead of always being the one who makes the call for example?
2011 is going to be about making better choices, and not always giving to people that don't deserve it. I believe that people are meant to come into your life, but it is up to you if you want to give them a permanent spot in your days.
In turn, I want to be there more for my children. I know what people will say after I say this, but I am done with the PTO/PTA's of this world. This is yet another aspect of my life that is a constant take from me, and what do I get in return? More stress than I can handle. I am on my way to a nervous breakdown because of this years PTA and it must stop. So, I am all about doing what needs to be done, nothing more. There are people that are in charge of things, and that is the way it will be for the next few months. I want to read with my kids, help with their homework, play games, not be bogged down with crappy people and crappy problems.
I want a new house. There are a lot of things that I really like about this house, but we are just outgrowing it. I am now leaning towards building a house. There are 2 existing houses that I love, but they both have things I wish were different, so if we are going to spend the money on a new house, why not build a house we want! I think this will help the kids too.
I am trying to figure out who I am. Why was I put on this earth? What do I have to give to others? My goal for 2011 is to figure all that out.
1 comment:
Alot of you wrote, is what I have been thinking too!! I have some friends like you mentioned... I seem to be the one usually calling and giving. But then true friends are the ones that you know will always be there even if you have not spoken in years.
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